Wednesday, December 18, 2013

A Christmas Benediction

Last week, I went to my coffeeshop with the intention of getting some work done. It was open-mic poetry night. I have a slight ache in my heart every time I am there for open-mic poetry night, because a friend of ours, Cloyd, a regular of Jacksons in general, was also known to share his poetry ( namely his celebrity death Haikus) at this monthly event. Cloyd passed away last year, but his memory contained within the walls of Jacksons is palpable. Last week, the host of the Poetry Night read Cloyd holiday standard " A Christmas Benediction"- a beautifully crafted piece bestowing a blessing onto those he loved during the holidays. Several ideas floated around my head as I listened to Cloyds generous words from beyond the grave. I wondered if my loved ones were included in the kind thoughts of our departed friend. I thought about how amazing it is that his humanity can echo past his demise. I thought about how strange and odd Cloyd was- the math genius with one wrinkled shirt tail untucked, and tried to remember if I saw the compassion that lingered just below the surface. I wondered about my own kindness, and if I have left an indelible enough mark on the world for my words to echo to others the way that Cloyd’s were to me. As the week passed, I was also encountered with a number of people who are having a very hard time in life right now, for one reason or another. I am drawn toward the idea that I need to give them all SOMETHING...but time and resources are limited, and I can't give them all exactly what they need. The only thing I can do is give them what I can. A benediction is not something I would be good at, generally. First, it calls on a divinity that I simply don't put a great deal of stock into. Calling on the spirits or asking for divine intervention...it's not my thing. However, there is a second part to a benediction. A call for guidance through a time of trouble. That is something I can get down with. So, to everyone out there- people I love, people I know, people I have not yet had the chance to meet- this is MY Christmas Benediction to you. 



This Christmas, I give to you this wish
I wish for you to see the fortune in every moment
even when that moment feels unfortunate
I wish for you to know the power of giving
over the disappointment of losing
I wish for you to invest yourself into moments you are creating
instead of fixating on the moments that someone else is missing

This Christmas, I give to you this wish
I wish for you to know love, not as something that is bestowed upon you
but as something you have earned
I wish for you to be able to embrace your own worth,
and demand your worth be appreciated by others
I wish for you to know that bad decisions have consequences,
but even the worst decision can be made right with effort, time, and patience

This Christmas, I give to you this wish
I wish for you the ability to see how precious you are
and the value of your possessions or your bank account does not undermine that
I wish for you the chance to show how brave you can be
and the opportunity to be proud that you overcame
I wish for you the clarity to see where you have misstepped
and the courage to let it shape you without defining you

This Christmas, I give to you this wish
I wish that you find beauty in your path
even if that path led to you somewhere you didn’t intend
I wish for you the ability to change your story
and make yourself into the person you want to be
I wish that you find peace
and know that it’s okay to have sorrow, but you cannot let it destroy you

This Christmas, I give to you this wish
I wish for you to find the strength to forgive
and know that forgiveness is more about you than the person who wronged you
I wish for you to see that misery begets misery
and that people who hurt others create their own misfortune
I wish for you the security of priorities
and that you only focus on people and things that make your life better

This Christmas, I give to you this wish
I wish that you are able to leave those who hurt you in the past
and share your sunlight with only those who are invested in your future
I wish for you to see that people who love you do exist
and are most highlighted when you love yourself enough to believe it
I wish for you the strength to take on the hardest task,
to never stop trying,
because you know that you are worth the effort that happiness takes

This is my gift to you this Christmas