My own personal Jesus....

So, I posted about my problem to my fellow Mommies, searching for a therapist. Of course, what is so interesting is that my control-freak nature drove me to search for the PERFECT therapist. Here is how I described my ideal therapist:

So, I'm looking for a therapist recommendation, but I'm looking for something very specific, so please bare with me for a moment.

I need someone very...pragmatic I guess is the word. I have gone to review sites and to my insurance company listings and looked up options, but in the end, none of those tell me the thing I'm looking to avoid, and I don't really want to go once and never come back. I'm looking for help with a very specific ( anxiety related) issue, but I want to avoid things that are ( searching for the word.....) crunchy??? I am not looking for spirituality or eastern philosophy, and if there is a dream catcher, I will head for the hills, even if it's symbolic in nature. I have no problem with emotions or metaphors, but I am looking for someone who doesn't take "sensitivity" to another level where it becomes about the vibrations I'm putting out into the universe....does that make sense?

I know this sounds incredibly nit-picky of me, but my experience has shown me that there are a number of those types of therapists that exist, and while I can appreciate that might work for some people, I do not believe it will work for me. I would like to avoid that, especially since I doubt my insurance is going to pay for 5 or 6 "new patient" visits. Any and all recommendations would be appreciated.

Well, I got a few recommendations, and made a few calls, when one of my mommies tells me that I should look into Dr. Brene Brown, and led me to a YouTube video of her TedTalk.

I can't lie, I'm now totally a Dr. Brown junkie.  I spent the next week watching everything I could get my hands on of hers, making my husband and my friends watching these.  Some of my vagueness  on the subject at hand will make sense after you watch these.

Disclaimer:  These are not touchy, feely, embrace-your-inner-goddess videos...they are TEDtalks, and it has completely changed how I see the world

First Video

Second Video

Third Video

Now, perhaps you can see why Dr. Brown is my own personal Jesus.  She speaks to me in a way that I crave- practical, reasonable...solutions and tools.  You can also see where I got the idea that I am stepping into the arena...I found that through her, and I am grateful.

And, perhaps, now it makes sense why I need to go through this journey publicly...without shame or fear.  My chronicalling of this is me being vulnerable...honest...authentic.  I am telling the world where I am and how I got here.  Through this, I might have struggles...I might need to be called out and forced to be vulnerable.

But, embracing vulnerability is what I am all about right now.  In upcoming posts, I'll talk about how this is changing me as a person, a wife, a friend, an employee, a leader, a parent ( that's a big one!) and as a person in general.